Santa is actually a Wizard!

on December 13th, 2009 by Matt | 6 Comments »

Those who have read/watched Harry Potter will know exactly what I’m talking about. Lets go with the short version first.

Santa is a wizard because he uses the Floo network, an extensive amount of house elves, a Time Turner, a levitation spell on a sleigh which is pulled by hippogriffs that have been transfigured into reindeer, and his real name is Nicholas Flamel.

Lets begin with the Floo network. In Harry Potter, wizards have many modes of transport, one being something called the Floo network. This is a simple network of fireplaces in houses and companies across the world. Basically, you take some Floo powder, step into the fireplace, and as you throw the powder into the fireplace you yell where you want to go. Eg. In the second Harry Potter movie/book, Harry goes from The Burrow (Row Weasley’s house) to Knockturn Alley (accidently, he was actually supposed to go to Diagon Alley, but didn’t pronounce it correctly and came out one fireplace too far).

How about the extensive amount of house elves. Now, we are all told that Santa had a bunch of elves, but we were never told what they look like (specifically). House elves are usually seen as slaves, but if treated correctly they can be very useful. Eg. The meals made in Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry are actually cooked by many house elves in a kitchen under the Great Hall. This is an example of many house elves working together happily and producing great results.

Nobody can figure out how Santa is able to deliver presents to every house in the world in a single night. This is where the Time Turner comes in. It’s a small device that spins, so when you turn it backwards, each turn symbolizes an hour. Eg. In the third Harry Potter book/movie, Hermione and Harry go back in time to save Buckbeak’s life and stop the dementors giving Sirius Black a Kiss.

Many people have different stories about how Santa’s sleigh can fly, but none of these have been confirmed. A simple levitation spell (or charm) that has been extended for each trip Santa makes. Eg. Professor Flitwick teaches in the first Harry Potter movie/book how to make objects fly: a swish and flick while saying Wingardium Leviosa.

Transfiguration is the subject taught by Professor McGonagall (the cat/witch at the start of the first Harry Potter book/movie). This is where you learn how to change things and animals into others. So, normal reindeer can’t fly, but hippogriffs can, that way it makes sense that Santa transfigured hippogriffs to look like reindeer. Eg. In the second movie when Ron is in Tranfiguration class with his broken want, the rat that he tried to transfigure into a goblet only changes half way.

Now for the bit that explains Santa’s true identity: Nicholas Flamel. We’ve all heard Santa being called “St. Nick” and Nicholas Flamel is known to have lived since the 15th century, by drinking the Elixer of Life (made thanks to the Philosopher’s Stone). That explains why people know Santa as “St. Nick” and how he has lived so long. If a person drinks the Elixer of Life over and over again over time, s/he can live for as long as they want. This also means that Dumbledore lied in the first Harry Potter book/movie when he said the stone was destroyed and Nicholas Flamel (and his wife, who by this explination must be Mrs. Claus) would die shortly afterwards. Eg. The Stone is what the first Harry Potter book/movie is based on.

So, I hope this has explained a few things for you, and I would love it if you could spread this information around (I give permission to print this post) so that everyone knows the whole truth. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

  • 😀 The truth shall set us free.

  • Thank God someone came up with a dipshit answer to a dipshit problem. I am eternally indebted to you.

    • WizardCM

      Good to know. 😈

  • Your blog keeps getting better and better! Your older articles are not as good as newer ones you have a lot more creativity and originality now keep it up!

    • WizardCM

      Thanks! The only problem is I keep running out of blog post ideas…

  • Hrmm that was weird, my comment got eaten. Anyway I wanted to say that it’s nice to know that someone else also mentioned this as I had trouble finding the same info elsewhere. This was the first place that told me the answer. Thanks.